I didn’t know I was caged,
Bound by tradition and fear.
For years inside I stayed,
Unaware I was queer.
Bound by tradition and fear,
I trusted they were right,
Unaware I was queer,
I thought the dark was light.
I trusted they were right:
It was all I knew.
I thought the dark was light;
I thought the sham was true.
It was all I knew;
I couldn’t see to see;
I thought the sham was true
Until I’d broken free.
I couldn’t see to see;
I didn’t know I was caged.
Until I’d broken free
For years inside I stayed.
Good work with the form! It was a lucky thing for me that I wasn't gay or bisexual, because the town I grew up in and the people I knew were super homophobic. It was so bad that one night when I had an erotic dream about a female classmate, who completely would not have been my type if I was gay, I sat there for a good hour wondering fearfully if I was "turning into a lesbian." That story may seem funny now, but at the time I was truly terrified of the possibility.
ReplyDeleteI'm still not entirely sure what that dream was about. I know that sex dreams usually aren't about sex. One positive thing that came from it was being forced to realize just how bad my own internalized homophobia was. I didn't hate gay people, but the possibility of "turning gay" was so terrifying to me that I was fairly well incapacitated for an hour. It made me examine the reasons for that feeling.
Sunflower