13 October 2020

OctPoWriMo 13 - I Was Caged

I didn’t know I was caged,

Bound by tradition and fear.

For years inside I stayed,

Unaware I was queer.

Bound by tradition and fear,

I trusted they were right,

Unaware I was queer,

I thought the dark was light.

I trusted they were right:

It was all I knew.

I thought the dark was light;

I thought the sham was true.

It was all I knew;

I couldn’t see to see;

I thought the sham was true

Until I’d broken free.

I couldn’t see to see;

I didn’t know I was caged.

Until I’d broken free

For years inside I stayed.


1 comment:

  1. Good work with the form! It was a lucky thing for me that I wasn't gay or bisexual, because the town I grew up in and the people I knew were super homophobic. It was so bad that one night when I had an erotic dream about a female classmate, who completely would not have been my type if I was gay, I sat there for a good hour wondering fearfully if I was "turning into a lesbian." That story may seem funny now, but at the time I was truly terrified of the possibility.
    I'm still not entirely sure what that dream was about. I know that sex dreams usually aren't about sex. One positive thing that came from it was being forced to realize just how bad my own internalized homophobia was. I didn't hate gay people, but the possibility of "turning gay" was so terrifying to me that I was fairly well incapacitated for an hour. It made me examine the reasons for that feeling.